Listen to Pinky McKay's talk on infant sleep

I was listening to this recording today and reminded again how much babies are biologically programmed to remain in the stone age. And I ask myself, when grown adults (ie. parents) prefer sleeping together rather than alone, because let's face it, most couples DO sleep together....where is the biological sense in leaving a baby to sleep alone?
Of course, every family does what feels right for them, but why does sharing sleep with, or sleeping in close proximity to, your beautiful baby seem wrong to so many people? Is it those prudish Victorian values rearing their ugly head again? Hmm, let's think about that...

and in the meantime, have a listen to Pinky's informative talk by clicking on the PREVIEW for "The Con of Controlled Crying" here.

She also writes some excellent books one of which is 100 ways to Calm the Crying.

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Survey of Mothers' Sleep & Fatigue

Survey of Mothers' Sleep & Fatigue
by Dr. Kathleen Kendall Tackett and Dr. Thomas Hale

You are eligible to participate in this study if you currently have a baby or child 12 months of age or younger.

In this survey, they will be asking you some detailed questions about how well you and your baby sleep, where members of your family usually sleep, and how tired you feel on most days. They will also ask you some questions about things that can interfere with sleep. There are very few studies on this important topic, and they will use the results for a research study.

Click HERE for the survey.

Carrying your baby

We all want our babies to cry less, grow well, and sleep contentedly. We want them to learn easily, to have good muscle development, and to feel settled. Isn't it amazing that just carrying your baby in a sling can facilitate all those things?

For more detailed insight into how this works, see the book "Babywearing".
From the Amazon description "If someone told you they knew a secret to help your baby sleep better, cry less, and learn better, you would certainly be interested... Babywearing, the practice of carrying baby in a soft carrier close to our body as we go about our daily business, is parenting's best kept secret. Good things happen when we wear our babies. Babies who are worn cry less, are more calm and content, sleep more peacefully, nurse better, gain weight better, enjoy better digestion, and develop better. Babywearing benefits parents! It enhances parent-baby bonding, is practical, facilitates breastfeeding, helps working parents reconnect, and makes transitions from one caregiver to another easier. But most importantly, it allows you to meet your baby's need to be held while allowing you to meet your need to get things done! Anyone can wear baby - mom, dad, sister, brother, grandparents, baby sitters, and day care workers. The more baby is worn the happier baby is. And, a happy baby makes a family happy."

I have a copy for loan to mothers who attend Little Angels groups at my house, and LLL Tokyo Central library has a copy for loan and another for sale.

There are so many baby carrier options available these days, it can be very hard for parents to know which one would suit them best. As the site Mamatoto says, "You only need to learn ONE carry with ONE type of carrier." Don't let the variations overwhelm you. The site has details on all the different ways to use the various styles of slings, with photos and diagrams.

For reviews of the various kinds of carriers and the people who sell them, check out The Babywearer.com

Oh and by the way, I am obviously biased by the fact I stock and sell Maya Wrap slings I try not to let this colour my judgment too much. Any sling is better than no sling. It is the act of wearing your baby that matters. Different slings work for different people, and I started to import the Maya Wrap slings several years ago when you couldn't buy slings in Tokyo at all. In fact, one resourceful mother bought a Maya Wrap, copied it, starting sewing them for her friends, and now she runs a HUGE sling company in Japan, selling the same basic type of sling for about 10 times the price. Seriously, a sling does not have to cost the same price as a small vehicle. Fashion item...possibly. Useful tool for parents...definitely!

Self-soothing solitary sleep

Sounds cold and lonely doesn't it?

What do you like to do to before you sleep? Apart from the obvious...which for new parents may not even top the list...as the weather gets colder, maybe you like to have a cup of something warm and soothing, a chat and a cuddle with your partner, a bit of a read, maybe even a massage...that sounds like a nice way to ease ourselves into the world of sleep, doesn't it? And it feels good!

Why then do we want our little babies to learn to sleep alone and without human contact from a young age, when we all know how nice the alternative feels? Is it fear that keeps us from being warm, loving and gentle with our babies as they transition to sleep, just as we are with our partners? Is it so important to "teach" our babies self-soothing solitary sleep, when as adults they most likely will not be interested in sleeping like that all?

Breastfeeding, rocking, patting, cuddling, stories, massage...these are the things babies love to do to help make that transition into sleep. Even your dog is happy when he gets stroked and cuddled. What are we really doing to our own human babies with sleep schools, sleep management programs, controlled crying and strict schedules, avoiding eye contact, avoiding human contact, ignoring cries and imposing arbitrary sleep times and expectations?

PS. "Self-soothing solitary-sleeping babies" is a phrase which appears in Pinky McKay's new book, Sleeping like a Baby She is not an advocate of the practice!